Notes From Lair Talk

Thanks to Groovedog from the ATL Lair for writing out some notes from Me and Doc's lair talk. Here is the Daygame section:



Daygame

-minimal kino

comment: an obvious point, but good to hear it explicitly stated. Do a hand shake, maybe a high-five or a pound, at the most a light hug, but keep it at that (barring some extreme circumstances). Extensive kino during night game is meant to escalate up to a makeout, or sex. 99% of the time that won't be happening in the day, so just keep it light. Also, in most situations, it's just not socially acceptable to be getting all touchy-feely at a place like a coffee shop, bookstore, or what have you.

-Go direct. Doc's approach:
"Hey... I know this is totally random, but I just saw you over here and I had to come meet you... I'm " (something like that)... Then handshake, get name. Go from there.

It's a higher risk-reward approach, meaning you put yourself out there for her to say "Sorry, I have a boyfriend", etc. This means it takes balls to do, which in turn means the girl will be incredibly flattered, and will generate a lot of attraction from the get go. Also, it cuts through the bullshit of gimmicky openers, opinion openers and such, and gets directly to the point.

Doc's Daygame "Method":
Open
(optional false time constraint)
Cold Read/Ping for qualification
Fluff about cold read/DHV
Qualify again
Tease
Grounding (where the magic happens)
Qualify again (hard)
Rapport
(optional insta-date)
Number close
Opening was covered above.

Cold read can be "You totally look like a New York girl" or anything that makes a statement about her. This doubles as a chance to guage where you're at. If she gives a lot of content with her answer to your cold read, i.e. "OMG! No, I'm from Chicago, but I love New York, I want to move there one day, etc..." then you know you have a lot of attraction/don't need to DHV. If she's less responsive, then hit some attraction switches with your fluff talk.

Qualify again after you've relayed your story, with something like, "So... what do you do, when you're not ?"

If her response is something generic/mundane like, "I hang out with my friends, go to school, etc." then you can tease, "COOOOL.. I have FRIENDS TOO! WOW!" while rolling your eyes.

Then go into your grounding sequence, "No really, what do you do? Like for me... I do " She should give some IOIs. Then throw out the bait again, "So really, what are you really into? Or passionate about?"

Qualify hard when she says what she's really into by saying something like, "No way, that's amazing.. I really like that you ".

Go into general rapport, talking about a wide range of topics, ideally her asking things about you (piercings, clothings, hobbies, etc). For maybe about another 3 minutes.

When it comes time to lead to the next step go for the insta-date if possible. Like, "Hey, I'm going to get some coffee, let's go." (More about leading later) If that's not possible...

Number Close:
"You seem cool. We're gonna exchange numbers and... maybe if we like each other on the phone, we'll hang out somewhere down the road."

MULDER: Hey Scully, if you could be somebody else for a day, who would it be?

SCULLY: Hopefully myself.

MULDER: So boring! I mean, wouldn't you even be tempted to try out someone else's existence for a day, live your life as somebody else?

SCULLY: Looking like someone else, Mulder, and being someone else are completely different things.

MULDER: Well, maybe it's not, I mean everybody else around you would treat you like you were somebody else, and ultimately maybe it's other people's reactions to us that make us who we are.